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(Excerpts from the speech given during a Nikah ceremony)
Nikah is an institution where through cautious acceptance, a man and a woman unite as husband and wife and enjoy their conjugal rights. This bond does not confine itself to their individual and familial lives; rather it reaches beyond the four walls of the home and the boundaries of the family. It becomes a cornerstone of society. It ensures that they, as well as their future offspring, strive together to uphold its welfare. For a married couple, meaningful contribution to society depends on two key factors: upholding each other's rights and personifying good manners.
Upholding mutual rights keeps their marital relationship harmonious and joyful. This, in turn, strengthens their understanding of the responsibilities as a part of a society. It motivates them to fulfil these obligations to the best of their abilities. From treating their neighbours with kindness to caring for the downtrodden and deprived, they strive to enjoin what is good and forbid what is harmful and detrimental to the cause of society and thus contribute to the creation of an ideal society. This is achievable only when both husband and wife adhere to the principle of Taqwa or God-consciousness, a quality emphasized repeatedly during the Nikah sermon through the recitation of specific Quranic verses, as mandated by Prophet Muhammad (pbuh).
As far good manners are concerned, within the vicinity of home, a new chapter in a husband's life begins. His life becomes truly admirable only when he treats his wife with respect and kindness. The credibility of his social persona is not just built in the public eye but is first established within the confines of his own home. Here, he holds significant power, while his wife may often remain in a vulnerable position. Yet, it is his noble conduct, even when holding the reins of power, makes him a good husband, a devoted father and ultimately, a respected person beyond the household. Indeed, a man who exercises self-control, even when given complete freedom, will carry that same discipline when faced with restrictions of the outside world.
For a wife, the pinnacle of her good manners lies in assuming her husband's role and wholeheartedly positioning with his vision and ambitions. Within the home, she becomes the driving force that inspires him to embody her prayers, wishes and desires in the world, motivating him to win hearts with tireless effort. Islam beautifully encourages this noble role for a woman, to be her husband’s inspiration and lend unconditional support in all that he does. Defining the qualities of such an ideal wife, the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said:
زَوْجَةٌ مُؤْمِنَةٌ تُعِينُهُ عَلَى إِيمَانِهِ
and a believing wife who supports him in his faith.
(At-Tirmidhi – Narrated by Hazrath Souban)
It means that the woman's life is in perfect harmony with man, just as a seed is intricately connected to the earth. It is just a status, not about gender disparity, but rather an acknowledgment of their complementary roles. The husband and wife, in their respective roles, faithfully obey Allah and His Messenger (pbuh) and act in accordance with their defined duties and responsibilities. This harmonious partnership is regarded as the highest form of success, a truth beautifully echoed as the closing reminder of the Quranic Verses recited in Nikah Sermon:
وَ مَنْ یُّطِعِ اللّٰهَ وَ رَسُوْلَهٗ فَقَدْ فَازَ فَوْزًا عَظِیْمًا
And whoever obeys Allah and His Messenger has indeed achieved a great success.
(Surah Al-Ahzab: 71)
Nikah is an institution that contributes to the welfare of society. It allows a man and woman to enjoy their conjugal rights and be a sure cause of the change within and beyond their home. Through their union, they become beacons of inspiration for those around them by embodying values that uplift the humanity. This sacred bond reflects an intrinsic ambition of the entire family: for the husband, wife and their children to guide humanity with wisdom and exhortation, stepping forward as leaders:
رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ اَزْوَاجِنَا وَ ذُرِّیّٰتِنَا قُرَّةَ اَعْیُنٍ وَّ اجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِیْنَ اِمَامًا
Our Lord, bless us with wives and children, who may be the comfort of our eyes, and make us leaders of the righteous. (Surah Al-Furqan: 74)
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Muhammad Abdullah Javed is Director of ITQAN, Raichur (9845547336 – [email protected])
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